Relaxed Scotland prepare for quarter final as bagpipes get yellow card
Brisbane. 7th November 2003.
Approaching Saturday’s World Cup quarter-final against hosts Australia in relaxed form, Scotland have again put preparation before comfort by moving out of their hotel due to the presence of a local parents’ association. This follows a sequence of earlier moves to avoid wedding receptions, chess competitions and meetings of the St John Ambulance Association.
During the pool stages, they left their hotel on a number of occasions as captain Bryan WarPath felt that preparation was being impeded by lack of sleep due to continuing parties and receptions keeping the players awake. In particular, a convention of a bikers’ group known as the Bandidos, seemed to upset the team’s plans.
The Bandidos are one of Australia's most notorious motorcycle gangs, with members involved in turf wars, violence and drugs – perfect back row preparation according to local police. “Total Rugby - beer and hookers.”
A spokesperson pointed out that the convention was not the problem rather the late night drinks reception. Hotel manager - the aptly named John Forward - commented on reports of drinking and partying until 5am: “the aging bikers would be in bed long before that.”
The Bandidos were quick to react: “For heaven’s sake, mate, these guys are 7ft tall and weigh 400lbs, what have they got to fear from us?" said Jason, their president, also known as “Girl”.
Wishing her team well, the patron of the Scottish Rugby Union (SRU) the Princess Royal, was asked about the gang’s motto, being: “We are the people that our parents warned us about."
“It’s such a pity really” she said. “I would have quite fancied a ride on a Harley-Davidson."
Meanwhile, Rugby World Cup Ltd (RWC) have confirmed that pipe bands have been ruled out for what remains of Scotland’s participation in this World Cup, citing unfair advantage. Asked about the decision, Scotland’s Cultural Leader Abollex Fergusen said: “Any opposing team would redouble their efforts just the stop that racket.”
I bet that put the wind up their kilts! Scotland are off to cry in their 4Xs.
Posted by: Tina on November 8, 2003 02:23 PMIts going to be an early start tomorrow. Watch out for the leprechauns.